Showing posts with label Schuller. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Schuller. Show all posts

Thursday, 16 July 2009

The Truth about Robert H. Schuller


Our crack team of Calvinistic Cartoons Investigators (CCI) have uncovered the truth about Robert H. Schuller.
If this information were not true and documented we would not be sharing this with our viewers.

The following is what was discovered:

Robert Harold Schuller was never ordained, never wrote a book, never went to seminary and never started a church he called, "The Crystal Cathedral".
He has never had an "Hour of Power" TV show or worn a silly looking robe!
In fact, his parents never named him Robert - neither was his last name Schuller.
He has never even been to the United States, much less, California.
His real name is Jakobshavn Haagenborgen and he has lived in Norway for the last forty seven years!

Friday, 19 December 2008

Pardon Me


The newest ministry of Robert Schuller which involves giving indulgences out to "celebrities ONLY" stems from his book, "Self-Esteem, the New Reformation". The only catch is they have to appear on his program and speak for three minutes...then, he, in turn, will bless them and assure them that there is a place for them in Heaven - no matter what Hell they raise while here on earth.  (please do NOT say I was cussing...Hell is an actual place - like Las Vegas or Salt Lake City)