A Letter from Placebo Belkins

This package came in from the U.S. yesterday from a Dr. Placebo Belkins. Included in the envelope were some DVD's of Belkins lecturing at Yale. (not the university - the Yale Lock and Hardware Company) Here is part of the three page letter sent:

Dear Mr. Eddings,

I hope this letter finds you in good health. I am interested in becoming a writer for your blog. As you can see by the printed copies of my certifications, I am more than qualified to direct your funny little blog into a more focused theological one. I hear you are leaving for the States this summer. I would like to suggest you hire me for the three months in which you'll be traveling. I happen to know you will be visiting Houston, Dallas, Durango and London, England.

I am willing to work for half my normal fee of $200 a day. I promise more readers, more followers, more comments, more pizzazz and more solid content. It's easy to see your days are numbered. You can't keep this up forever. Take a mental vacation and let me take over the writing for the months of June, July and August. You won't be sorry.

Waiting for your response,

Dr. Placebo Belkins

P.S. There is no tracking device in this envelope.

When I finished reading the letter, I began to put everything back in the large envelope. That's when I noticed...inside the package - glued to the bottom - was a tracking device with the initials N.P. written on the top. The only N.P. I know of, besides Natalie Portman, is Nigel Pettibone! This was a trap! I have destroyed the package and it's contents. Hope it wasn't too late.

  

The Angry Bird Church Building

Corky and Eddie visit the Angry Bird church of Nickelodeon, North Dakota

Ad of the Month

Avengers Background

Watch for this scene if you see the movie...

and note who is in the window of the building in the background.

Feel free to use this as a unnumbered Just for Laughs

and provide a caption or two.

Surprise Move

In a surprise move, last night, Nigel Pettibone was seen diving from an aircraft not too far from the Calvinistic Cartoons Secret Headquarters in Kuwait. Nigel was overheard telling someone that he was on a "mission of extreme gravity". As he jumped, he yelled, "Remember the bombing of Pearl Bailey!" No one has seen him since.

Worthy Destination

Beware the Goober Twins

Bob and Rob Goober, members of the Arminian Church of Armenia, Texas, have decided to give Calvinistic Cartoons legend, Corky Velveeta, a bad name. They visit locations and "e-vandal-ize" public property. Last report we heard, some gentleman approached Rob and, thinking he was Corky, said "Cotton Adams was a Calvinist". Corky, in return, gives $7,000 to that person, but Rob grabbed the man's wallet and rolled down an embankment to an awaiting car driven by Bob Goober. If you spot these two evil twins please contact me so we can keep track of these two asinine Arminians.