March Calendar

Finney's Nightmare

Benny Finney was afraid,

When on a pillow his head laid,

To dream of things like Romans 9;

Of Corky Velveeta and his kind.

Who Be Me?

One Book Commentaries

Please list some of your favorite one-book commentaries.

One of my all-time favorites is Jude: The Acts of the Apostates by S. Maxwell Coder

You take a peek at it right cheer!

Beautiful Music for a Beautiful Bride

Arminian Antics #41

Is The Widget Working?

I have doubts that my newest widget is working properly. Numbers of comments have seemed to decrease from certain individuals lately. I may need to reload it or replace it with another widget from another source. So please let me know if you detect any discrepancies in its functioning. Thanks, amigos.

Announcement

Just for Laughs #148

Before you leave...provide us all with a caption!

Just for Laughs #147

Time for some table talk captions.

Just for Laughs #146

Y'know ya can't just pass this one up. Provide ye a caption!

Just for Laughs #145

Don't just sit there! Come up with a caption!

Fan Photo from Galahad Pontoon

A hearty thanks and a check for $7,000 goes out to long time fan, 

Mr. Galahad Pontoon of Pencil Neck, Nebraska.

You have made my President's Day!   

Just for Laughs #144

Fiddle around with a caption then let us hear it.

Fan Photo from Cappy McBride

Cappy McBride has sent us this old comic book ad. Were WE ever surprised!

He will be surprised when he finds a check for $7.00 in his mailbox!

Pump Up the Captions!

Dangerous Dogma

Arminian Antics #40

To Set the Record Straight

I want to clear the air once and for all. I never agreed with the Civil War. There was nothing civil about it! I have always believed things could have been settled in a more civilized manner. I'm glad it's over.   

Memories are Made of This

Awkward Encounters

Jim Pemberton said in a previous post...

Before I joined a Southern Baptist congregation, I was a Lutheran. I had joined when my dad married a Lutheran after my mom died although my ecclesiological sensibilities were Baptistic having been baptized a couple years earlier in an anabaptist church. As such, I was taken in by a less-than-traditional independent Baptist family who added me as a tenor to their musical group. The pastor of one particularly fundamental church we sang in found out I belonged to a Lutheran church and exclaimed, "If I knew he was a Lutheran, I would never have let him sing here!"

This triggered a memory of the time I was baptized. I had been saved only a few weeks. I had been a drug-using, rock musician with hair down to my shoulders. I had my hair cut, but not enough for an independent Baptist little old lady. After my baptism, I was being congratulated by many in the congregation, who were expressing their love and blessings for God's mercy and grace on my behalf. This little lady, who I remember had an angry look on her face, came up to me and said, "Why do you wear your hair like THAT!" I didn't know what to say, I just stammered while my joy was punched in the stomach. 

Have you ever had an "awkward encounter" with a Christian or an unbeliever?

Old Movie Poster Discovered

Rejected Magazine Cover

Not all covers submitted are used. This cover almost made it to print.

Once is Enough

Have you ever visited a church or just gone into a service, sat down and wished you could get up and run out?
In Mesquite, Texas, fifteen or sixteen years ago, my wife and I entered a church that started an hour later than our home church. (We were so late that we decided to visit that church instead of slinking into ours in the middle of the sermon.)
The first thing I noticed was that none of the men had a beard or mustache. Fact is, no male there had sideburns that were more than half an inch in length. The pastor had a "throne" type chair where he continually stared at me and my wife. The only person who said anything to us was the lady we sat next to. The songs were sung at a faster speed than normal and the invitation the pastor gave lasted longer than his sermon. I had also brought the wrong translation. I don't think anything other than the KJV was welcome, even if you were just a guest. I felt a little like the guy in this comic panel...

Have you ever had an uncomfortable experience while visiting a church? 

Ad a Caption

Ad a Caption! Yes, it is an ad for some book.

That's why "add" is spelled wrong.

Now see if you can come up with something clever or funny...or both.

Paint by Number

Thanks Irv Binglett for sending us this flyer you found on your windshield when you came out of Home Depot. Because you took the time and the effort to send us this, we will take the time and effort to send you a check for $7,000. It's our way of saying we appreciate our followers. 

Warming Up

The Cure for Gossip

Arminian Antics #39

Science and Invention

Science can be a cruel mistress.

Although, sometimes we all benefit from scientific breakthroughs!

Hmmmm....complete with vegetables and stuffing!

Help Find Corky

click for a much biggerer view...it'll help

Can you spot Corky Velveeta in this “Green Coffee Bean Illusion“?

Once you find the face in this coffee beans pile, every next time

you look at this picture you will see it immediately!

Balloon Talk #1

Ever so often I will post a photo with an empty balloon for you to fill. Remember the Calvinistic Cartoons K.I.T. formula - Keep It Theological. I will pick one comment that I think is funny and fill in the balloon giving credit to the "winner". Don't worry about the size of the balloon, I can adjust it to your dialog. Just keep it short as possible. Only fill in the balloon - don't add other dialog from someone else in the photo. Have fun and enjoy the laughs!

Christian School

At Last!

Giving

A Blogger's Vexation

Also Heartless

Corky and I at the Potato Head Playhouse

This review was taken from Theater Happenings magazine.

It was written by Sir David Pettibone"

"Vern Wallnecker’s problem play – about an upper-crust British family that is shaken to its core – gets a solid, stiff-upper-lipped revival at Flamboils’s intimate 62-year-old Potato Head Playhouse.
Director Fritz McMann peoples Lulu Hackensack’s richly paneled set with a cast that sounds veddy, veddy British and looks the part, too, in costumes by Sissy Dublin.

It is 1912 and the Kinklebean's are celebrating the engagement of their daughter, Sheila, to the son of Mr. Kinklebean’s business rival. This marriage may portend a merger between the companies.

But the bliss is interrupted by the arrival of Inspector Goole, who has questions about a young woman’s recent suicide. Before the night is out, everyone is implicated in some way in the demise of Eva Smith.

Wallnecker, who wrote the play in 1945, was making a larger point: Everyone’s actions, or inactions, affect humanity; we are our brothers’ keeper. If the inspector lays it on a little thick – and he does – well, that’s what it takes to get through that thick British crust.

Eddie Eddings is a standout (love the space helmet) as the sincere Thomas Earwig, as is Emily Maggots as Sheila, his bride to be.

Susan Brickfoot, as Mrs. Kinklebean, is spot-on as a preening woman of society who looks down her nose at everyone. Kip Loman as the rakish young Eric Kinklebean  captures the character’s disdain for his family, even as he takes advantage of it.

Leo Lawnwagon has a better command of his blustery character, patriarch Arthur Kinklebean, than he does of his lines, making for some uncomfortable moments.

As the inspector, Russ Birdhamper is investigator, prosecutor and judge, making a “nasty mess” of the Kinklebean's polite dinner party. 

Corky Velveeta has not a single line or dialog until the final speech, but his presence on stage helps remind the audience that they are ignorant of so many things.  

His final speech is a haunting bit of monologue, akin to Jacob Marley’s ghostly “mankind was my business” speech in Dickens’ “A Christmas Carol.”

“A Grenade in the Mist” is a style of show that isn’t performed often, and the Potato Head Playhouse is to be commended for tackling it and, for the most part, delivering a solid effort.

I only wish I seen a movie instead."

Even More Predictions

Vernon Fluffenutter, the pastor of the Church of the Now Ready for End Time Prayers, said his prophecies are 100% accurate or you can stone him if they are not fulfilled by the year 2045!

Here are a few of his latest prophetic utterances he made while in mid-sermon:

On Earth Day in the year 2044, the White House will be repainted and called the Green House. 

An Oprah clone named Koprah will come out with her own magazine called, OK.

In the year 2044 Roman Catholic pope, Fern Tallowitz, will fall into an open manhole. 

Rick Warren's very last book, The Monkey-Driven Evolutionists, will be made into a 3-D TV movie starring Miley Cyrus.

The Federated States of Micronesia, in the year 2043, will declare war on bloggers. Many thousands will lose their lives in the struggle for cyber real estate. 

Church, as we know it, will not be like the church as we know it. But the underground church, as we can imagine, will be just like you imagine.

Frosted Flakes will cease to exist.

Corky Velveeta will be added to Mount Rushmore by mistake.

Fan Photo from Blotch Haven

Many thanks to Blotch Haven for sending this photo of an old western magazine. We have notified Corky Velveeta and he should be knocking on your door, sometime next week, with a bag of money for your trouble. We Google-globed your address and found out that you live next door to Ed Young's pilot chauffeur.  

Dare to Be Different

Arminian Antics #38

Pig Pen Polemics #2

Skip Dover

Okay, ya gotta click to enlarge this!

Ya just gotta!

Branded

Bloggers and Beans

Riddles

Here are a few riddles for your enjoyment.

These are by no means new.

I just thought I'd post 'em here today

I had nothing else to do.

Q. Who was the greatest financier in the Bible? 

A. Noah. He was floating his stock while everyone else was in liquidation.

Q. Who was the greatest female financier in the Bible? 

A. Pharaoh's daughter. She went down to the bank of the Nile and drew out A little prophet.

Q. What kind of man was Boaz before he got married? 

A. Ruth-less.

Q. Who was the first drug addict in the Bible? 

A. Nebuchadnezzar. He was on grass for seven years.

Q. What kind of motor vehicles are in the Bible? 

A. Jehovah drove Adam and Eve out of the Garden in a Fury. 

A. David's Triumph was heard throughout the land. 

A. Honda...because the apostles were all in one Accord. 

A. 2 Cor. 48 describes going out in service in a Volkswagen Beetle: "We are pressed in every way, but not cramped beyond movement."